I had asked “Does money helpful or how can I relate it to my everyday life”? I ponder questions such as; Should I get along with people because I have money, should I belittle people because I have money, or do I feel miserable because I have money”.
These are ideas in my head and if the ideas are meaningless words, then I am wasting my energy. However, they are not meaningless to me.
To better understand my relationship with money I must go through some kind of experience in life and weigh what money is all about to me. Crazy enough I went through it.
My past few years of my life I had tons of money but I never bragged about it. I drove a Mercedes SUV to work and I had to parked my vehicle across the street so that no one know what I am driving because I don’t want to create a buzz at my workplace. I remembered, before I got out of my vehicle I looked around making sure will recognized me. I had done that as long as I can until I got caught by one of my co-worker. When he saw me he came and told me I must have lots of money for driving such an expensive vehicle. I blushed and walked away.
Those years when I had lots of money I was still married. Digging some memories back I was more focused on raising a family and money is just a part of it.
Some of my fond memories when I had money were; I never worried about paying bills, I had savings in the bank, driving a very expensive vehicle and if I wanted to buy something I can do it.
However, there was a side of money that ruin my life and relationship and I got to experienced that first hand. My ex- husband became a different person. He used money as to fill up a void in his life, bought material things to compete with other people then attempted to used that against me. The worst part was he looked at people poorly. I witnessed how money changed people and I felt miserable in the process. He became greedy and he didn’t had a concept of what it did to me.
After thirteen years of marriage I divorced him because he used the power of money and ventured into the world of hookers.
Over a few years I struggled for not not having enough money after my divorce. Opening my bills, worrying car payment, letter from a collection agency demanding payment plus raising my three kids was very challenging stage for me. I got depressed, frustrated and I feel miserable in the process.
My pay check was not enough. I count penny to pennies and buying something beside grocery was hard to come by. I had a boyfriend then but not much of a help because I became the bread winner not only raising three children but a grown up man (kind of embarrassing) but this is the truth. I woke up one day and realized that was not the life I would love to have. I made the decision to moved on.
Two years after that I started working again but still raising now two children as my older moved away. I was still struggling financially then but I became aware of my situation. I learned how to do couponing and got good at it. It is something that helped me in my grocery.
I was not looking for someone when I met Rebel. At first I was hesitant because I don’t want to go through what I went through but apparently the universe had some planned for me. We didn’t do the traditional courting game but from the very beginning I felt such strong connection with him. The kind when our energy combined it was very strong and things started happening faster and stronger.
He expressed his goal of opening a business for himself. At first I was not very sure, but because I have faith I quit my job so I can focus on learning our business together. My decision of quitting allowed me to learned faster than expected. To this day, I keep learning and were growing our business.
We hand happy days and gloomy days but we both learned how to framed our mind. We are both believed there’s a season for abundance and prosperity (just mentioning the words just make me happy).
I am mentally and physically happy having such a healthy relationship and I am grateful of it.
My relationship with money is open because I let go of those miserable moments that I went through. I don’t hate having lots of money as there was a certain point in time when I had money and no stress.
What I figure out about money is… I have respect, discipline and gratitude on the abundance of it. Once I hit the point of not worrying not having enough money anymore, I know what to do with it.
The best part of “Understandng My Relationship With Money” is… Rebel and I have many things plan what to do with. With what we have now our quality of life is starting to improve. How much more when money will flow freely.
And we are not only thinking about us but we are also thinking about helping others.
So, once anyone figure out the proper place money resides in their life, they’ll find that their life will become much more pleasant.